Who the hell am I?

Random person: "Hello nice to meet you! What's your name?"

Me : " Hi! My name is (insert name here). I am Mom to Hyper activity boy, Princess Diva girl, and Accident prone boy."

Random person: "Tell me about yourself"

Me: "Uhhhh, I thought I just did?"

  Really? Yeah, That's me. I don't know who the hell I am side from being a wife and  Mother. I got married really you. Two weeks after I turned 19. The only reason we waited was because my Husband is 5 months younger than me and we where waiting for him to turn 18. We have a cheap little wedding, with a $100 dress and a rental tux, but nonetheless, it was a wedding. No, I wasn't pregnant. We were just in love. We had been together since 2 weeks after I turned 16. (Do the math, we got married on our 3 year anniversary. CHEESY AS SHIT, but kind of cute?)
 6 months later, I started to grow a tumor in my stomach that I now call my first Son. 13 months after his birth, princess diva girl was born. 19 months after her birth, Accident prone boy was born. WTF? Haven't we ever heard of birth control?
  We have, but apparently it only works if you take it and not if it is just sitting in your purse for months. Why didn't anyone tell me that shit? Damn!
 We planned the first little dude, the other two, not so much. But we where thrilled to have them. I love being pregnant, and I love breastfeeding. I know what you're thinking... WTF KIND OF SICK AND TWISTED ROBOT AM I? Yes I am one of those people. The ones with the picture perfect pregnancy, that you envy so much you hate them. It makes me sick just thinking how perfect the pregnancies were. I threw up two times between all three pregnancies.
  So I got married at 19 to a guy I had been with non-stop since I was 16. I gave birth at 20, 21, and 22.
I am now 24. I am getting ready to potty train my last son. And my older two are both in Pre-K. So that is leaving me feeling so empty inside. No what am I good for? The only thing I have been doing for the last 5 years is being pregnant and breastfeeding. You know, along with cooking, cleaning, ass wiping, teaching, wiping tears, and all of the other stuff that comes along with motherhood. So I start thinking. I WANT ANOTHER BABY!! Wait? WHAT??? NO NO NO NO NO!!! HAVE I FUCKING LOST IT?? Yes, yes I have! I refuse to allow myself to go over the deep end! 3 is is plenty and all that we can afford right now? So what the hell am I supposed to do with myself??

  DAMMIT! I guess that leaves me only one thing to do and its been the one thing I have been avoiding forever! I have to get to know myself and love myself. I am not looking forward to that! I just seem so bitchy, who wants to love a bitchy person? Ugh!

Alright so lets see where do I start?

What do I already know about myself that doesn't have to do with kids?
Well lets see, I like to write and I am writing this blog so I am doing one thing for myself already... SCORE, this maybe easier than I thought!

Hmm, I love food! So should I eat more of it?? NO! NO! NO! WTF AM I THINKING? I am crazy mad over weight already! So I should work on getting healthy. Easier said than done, but it will totally be worth it. So lets do that! We will start with working out and shit.

I like to take pictures... of my kids.... so that wont work. Maybe I can find a new subject? I'll work on that.

I love make-up, I get to re-do my face and make you think I am good looking. So I'll continue that. I might scare you if you saw my naked face.

Reading? Can I read? Do I like to read?  Well, I can write so surely I can read. Do I like to read? I don't know lets try it.

Now what? What else can I do to find myself? I'm lost already. Great. Well that list seems over whelming already. I'll just start with that.

I guess I can write about my thoughts on shit. I guess I will get to know me if I do that? Whatever, lets start this party!

PS, Ignore typos, I have ADD my brain gets way ahead of me.